And so it begins...

I cried all the way down the street. I thought the radio would distract me. I thought the traffic would distract me. I thought the miles would ease the difficulty. It was many miles before I realized that the longer I waited for my strength to come, the harder it was to force myself not to turn the car around. Then I heard it. Have you ever been driving in the car and heard a song and thought to yourself, "wow I really needed that." Imagine the hardest day of your life and the most perfect song combining. It was like the moment in the movies when the song seems like it was written for that moment, those tears, these characters. I know this song wasn't written for me or my moment, but it was all I needed to turn my tear-filled eyes off of myself, my situation, and my ever-failing strength and turn my eyes to the one who is the source of all strength. If you haven't heard this song you should go listen to it. NOW. Ready? Go. I am sure that I will listen to it again and again as I so easily fall back into the habit of waiting for my strength to be all that I need to overcome my selfish desires of wanting to return to the place that I am comfortable. Because if I were to be honest, it was hundreds of miles and not even the distance could convince my flesh that this was a safe and happy place. My flesh is fighting harder than I could have ever prepared myself for. It wants to return home to the safe, the comfortable, the mundane of everyday life. But oh how I long to stay and fight to be sitting in His will. How I MUST fight to stay safe in His hands, in this time, in this place, out of my comfort zone, in His plan. This is where my heart longs to be. Sitting at the feet of the one who made me, fighting to be where he has willed me to be.

The motions--Matthew West

This might hurt, it's not safe
But I know that I've gotta make a change
I don't care if I break,
At least I'll be feeling something'
Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of life

I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,"What if I had given everything,
instead of going through the motions?"

No regrets, not this time
I'm gonna let my heart defeat my mind
Let Your love make me whole
I think I'm finally feeling something'
Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of this life

'Cause I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,"What if I had given everything,instead of going through the motions?"

take me all the way (take me all the way)
take me all the way ('cause I don't wanna go through the motions)
take me all the way (I know I'm finally feeling something real)
take me all the way

I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,"What if I had given everything,instead of going through the motions?"
I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,"What if I had given everything,
instead of going through the motions?"

take me all the way (take me all the way)
take me all the way (I don't wanna go, I don't wanna go)
take me all the way (through the motions)
take me all the way

I don't wanna go through the motions

Oh God that we would be a people that would cry out to you that we don't want to spend my whole life asking, "what if we had given everything, instead of going through the motions?"

Make me a person who won't waste my life going through the motions.
Take me all the way.

Richmond, Va-- Day 1